Excitement hit and I had no one to call.
Sure I could call whoever I wish, but the one I immediately wanted to…
I couldn’t bring myself to reach.
The phantom that haunts my heart.
Hesitation and silence have blocked the path.
Perhaps it gave clarity.
I have such exciting news.
I will just go write.
Category: Uncategorized
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Unshared Excitement
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Fabric of An Artist Soul
The fabric of who you are was woven before your first breath drew air in your lungs.
Sacred threads of a beautiful soul waiting to learn along life’s paths.
How many times you fall, then stand back up?
The muses along the way that inspire you through lessons.
Shaping who you become through each challenge and choice.
All in effort to find yourself.
Who you actually are when the world doesn’t see you?
The lessons leading you to your ability to be yourself.
Unwavering in opinions of those not critical to your outcome.
Being able to stand in all that is You courageously.
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My Love Affair with the Moon
When I was little I would stare out my window and see the moon. Her sparkle dancing on the shore.
Drawn to her and the water by night and the sun and water by day.
Overflowing with joy the days the moon sat in the sky near the sun.
Nights I couldn’t see her from my window, I would push my screen out my window to sneak out to find her.
My teen years I spent writing about the sky.
Climbing out my window to the roof every night.
Sitting there talking, feeling, listening to music.
My constant love and support.
The part of me that has had this love affair she remained untouched.
My silver lining to life’s harshness remains in the glow of the moon.
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Beyond the Veil
Cry not for me after I am gone.
Consider me as you did while I danced with the living.
Put no flowers for me if I could not inspire it with breath in my lungs.
In the afterlife, I will also require
a genuine soul.
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Two Things Can Be True
The quote “I’m not who I was before because she did not survive, I am who came after.”
I understand this down to every depth of those wounds, intimately. I also don’t believe that is entirely true.
Dissecting the darkest parts of myself, I still see her – the girl that has loved the moon, stars, sky for as far back as my memories can carry me. The one that loved nothing more than to be near the water, talking to animals, with toes in the sand and dirt, watching clouds. Grounded in myself. The beauty around me is bright still, and it’s emerging again. I don’t believe it’s truly gone because I found her in there. The part of me that died was the part that trusted people to have my heart. The idea that every soul and every life could remain untouched by evil was what was shattered. I lost trust in humanity, and now I see darkness lurking in every corner.
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Unwavering
You, a pivotal part of rewriting the wiring in my brain. You were strong and steady in reminding me who the hell I am. You have never wavered on the one fundamental fact. You tell me I know what to do and offer advice when I need that extra reassurance. I pray I’ve impacted you as deeply. You remind me of the magic I once wielded lifetimes ago. Your soul my safe sanctuary to grow and trust. Home to my passions. Mine is yours.
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Tethered by Invisible Strings
The air is thick with impending storms, and I’m feeling the weight of it. I was peaceful for days. Quiet and grounded, but the tears have come for me. Waves taking me under, my heart being pulled at. Making me ache with longing. And so again, I’m reminded that I’ll always be tied to this cord with you.
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Grounding Force
It was blurry, those lines between us. From the very first night, my soul felt seen. I didn’t know why, but I trusted you. Without any hesitation, I trusted you. Your voice has calmed my storms. Every single time, you answered when I needed you to remind me. The world was making me question my foundation; it was your voice that grounded me, still in who I was. The facts of the situation didn’t add up… How could this man be this way, and we be nothing? My spiral into darkness when the calls weren’t answered… Well, that was a death I had to learn to be reborn from. Still, the lesson I found was in ways you were grounding me. Your voice was in my head. When I was at my worst, I heard you telling me what to do. I heard you calm me, words that were so clearly yours. I heard your voice telling me I’m not stupid. All this creating more blurry lines in our story. I have no answers, and I’ve run out of questions. I simply know this: you are my grounding force and the one to whom my soul says listen.
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Whispers of Passion and Desire
If you listen you will hear it.
When you touch her skin, an exhale or soft moan.
Grazing her neck with your lips she will lean into you.
Safe, trust, knowing, submission.
Tracing your fingers along her thighs.
Sighs, light moaning at how alive she becomes because you awaken her.
Those moments when you massage her back and hips after she gave herself to you.
Etching new patterns into her head and heart.
If you pay attention to what she isn’t saying but what she is showing you.
It’s all there if you can open your eyes ears, and heart.
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A Body’s Betrayal
There are times that after I make myself eat I feel disgusting.
My thoughts go to getting on the scales halfway through.
Gluten free oatmeal with oat milk.
All things my allergies can and should tolerate.
Yet still, I feel like I just consumed unnecessary calories.
I don’t feel nourished.
I feel sluggish and bloated.
Like a hostage in my own body.
Deep seeded body dysmorphia from shame I didn’t deserve.
Most days a struggle.
I fight these demons every day but make no mistake this is a war.
Ink Stained Soul... 